To the grave

Certain secrets, Mother shouldn't know. I know she ponders these things, sometimes she even asks me straight out, but I will not tell:

1. How did I learn to suck in my belly when she weight tapes me? I blow up my belly for girthing (only a teensy bit, not like most horses). 1-b. How do I know that cookies keep flowing if the weight tape stays below 1,000 lbs? Actually, I've been staying well below 970 lbs, unless Mother keeps the tape on real long and I have to start breathing again.

2.Why am I rubbing my tail?

3. Where is the !$@!z&! old camera?

Even I don't know the answer to that one...